It’s done … and I survived!

Hi all – I got the LIS yesterday and I will say that I’m feeling physically better than I did before I got it. I’m not sure if that’s because I took a Percocet (but that was 10 hours ago). I admit right now that I have mixed feelings; but that’s mostly because of what I went through. I debated with myself most of today about whether or not I should share this story because I don’t want to scare newbies or pre-LISers. But then I thought that this is a forum to share information so that people can be empowered. So, here’s the story (I apologize for the long post).

When I met the doc I told him that things had gotten little bit better off and on, but I am still in quite a lot of pain. He said that must be because I’m not using the ointment properly. He must have seen the look on my face because he then said that we could consider surgery. I said I’d like to consider surgery because I don’t know how much longer I could go on like this. He said ‘let’s take a look’ and put me on a table that bends so that your ass is in the air. While my ass was in the air, he and the nurse started taping my buttocks. At that point I said ‘hold on!’ (I thought he was going to inspect me to tell me if he thinks I’m healing and should continue with the ointments or if he thought surgery was the right idea at this point.) When I said ‘hold on’, the doc got frustrated and said ‘you’re obviously not ready for surgery’. I said, ‘I’m prepared to have the surgery, I just have a few questions’. He said, okay and let me ask my questions, and he even answered them clearly. I asked him how many of these he had done, success rates, risks, post-op care, etc. I got the answers that satisfied me, so I said, ‘ok, we can do this’. I got back on the table.

Here’s my biggest mistake: I just assumed I would be sedated (that’s how the procedure at this clinic is described – that’s how everybody who has had this procedure at this clinic who has posted their experience online have described it – I was sedated for my colonoscopy at this clinic). While I was waiting for a needle with the happy-sleepy stuff to be put in my hand, I got three large needles in the ass right away – no sedation. Those needles hurt like a m--------ker! No kidding. SERIOUSLY F---KING HURT!!!!!! (Sorry for my language.)

Needless to say I let out a loud yelp with each needle. The doc told me to be quiet. Then he began cauterizing the skin tag … before I was completely numb. Needless to say, I yelped loudly again. That also hurt like a #$$#@. At that point, the doc said ‘if you don’t stop yelling, I’m going to stop right now’. At this point I’m incoherent. The doc then says to the nurse, ‘my hip is hurting, I’m going to sit down while the rest of the numbing takes effect’. I’m slobbering all over my own face, head-down, ass-up on the table. The doc sat for about 30 seconds and then got back up and finished the job. Everything was hurting and burning … I was moaning and slobbering and trying to stay still. The doc said ‘you’re a very nervous sort of person – someone like you should have this done at a hospital under general anesthesia.’

By the time he got to cutting the muscle itself, I was quieter – I couldn’t really feel anything – and he took his time. I could vaguely feel the cut and the snip and then it was over – mostly. The doc then jammed packing up my ass, which also hurt, and put some padding on my butt. I pushed myself off the table and pulled my pants up (there were just around my ankles). The Doc yanked my underwear up as far as they could go to hold the padding and sent me out with the nurse. I asked for pain meds. The doc said they weren’t necessary because I would be in less pain after the surgery than I was in before it. I staggered out of the office, bent over from shock and pain, the nurse helping me out. The doc shouts impatiently at me, ‘stand up straight!’ I was taken to recovery. The nurse spoke to the doc for me and got me a prescription for Percocet. (I didn’t ask her to – I love that nurse!). My husband got my prescription filled while I was in recovery. I tried to pee and couldn’t, but the packing fell out during the effort (thankfully!). I was released before I could pee … but I did pop a Percocet before I left because the nurse said that that numbing would go away in 20 minutes.

My husband took me back to the hotel because I couldn’t face an hour-long car ride home. I damn near threw up and passed out in the lobby. I dry-heaved all the way to the hotel room. I rested/dozed in the hotel room, but I keep waking up and crying every hour or so - I just burst into tears and hyperventilated. I couldn’t help it. At midnight, I took a Percocet and fell asleep. At 4am I woke up shaking, my whole body freaking out with fear, panic and sooooo much anxiety – I think from a bad dream. I got out of bed and felt nauseated as soon as I stood up. My hubby woke up in time to help me to the bathroom where I threw up while having my first post-LIS bowel movement.

I’m at home now, exhausted. There’s no burning and only very, very mild pain - mostly stinging at the fissure and incision sites. The skin tag site seems okay just now.

I know that I decided that I didn’t care about bed-side manner as much as competence, but I have to say I didn’t expect this guy to be such a sadistic (naughty naughty) (sorry for the language). I don’t know why I wasn’t sedated and why he started burning me before I was completely numb. He didn’t give a fig about pain-management and made me feel like a bit wimp. Well … I am a big wimp, but a pretty pissed off wimp right now!

I’m sorry for the long post. I’m just feeling pretty traumatized … and I’m feeling pretty sorry for myself. I don’t know what to feel. I want to celebrate having the LIS behind me now – but I am struggling with the psychological aftermath of the whole ordeal.

I just REALLY hope this LIS works because right now I don’t think I could look at another doctor again.

Thanks for listening
Hope

Holy Crap...That sounds awful! I can't believe he was able to do that right at his office and with such sadism. No sedation. What a Jerk!!!
I was completely knocked out for my LIS...I thought everyone was.
I am so sorry you had to deal with this surgeon. THAT IS NOT NORMAL and IT IS CRUEL. Can you report this man to some organization? to the Government?
Try to get yourself some valium, xanax, or adivan (that's what I am taking right now for the anxiety) from your General Practitioner or GI doc.
Oh my gawd...Hope..that just sounds so terrible, what an ordeal after all you have been through. I know the health care system in Canada is different than here, but there must be some accountability.
I hope you get some relief soon....

You should absolutely without a doubt report this doctor. I have not heard of ANYONE having LIS without sedation. And he SAT DOWN!! This doctor sounds likehe should be struck off. Don't let him get away with it or someone else unsuspecting, like yourself, will have a terrible reaction. This is a truly ghastly story. Sorry you went through it.

I seriously cannot believe you were put through that!!! I agree with frustrated I'd be reporting that guy to as many people as I could find who would listen that is shameful, shameful behavior, I've met alot of docs here, I even thought mine was bad but that is just leaving me speechless, but makes me want to rant!!
Oh, Hope, I am so so sorry it went that way for you, I've never heard of anyone having this done in an OFFICE VISIT! AWAKE!? I canny even begin to imagine your terror you are a stronger woman than me I think, I don't think I could've gone through that but THANK GOD it's over!!
No warning, no prep, no sleepy sleepy, nothing?! Despite all this, you are doing well and I'm happy for you in that at least, I really would try to spread the word about that doc I mean, that simply can't be legal to practice like that?!
You are right, it's over, you survived, and I'm sure the lack of burning is already evident, you can only go up from here! So make sure you rest, try to FORGET that experience like some (not me!) women forget childbirth, Think of your new bum as your bundle of joy, and heal, heal, heal! I'm sending healing vibes your way welcome back to life!

Oh dear dear Hopetoheal! I am absolutely shocked and appalled- really, I am not the type to suggest this, but I think you should sue this Dr. What you were put through is not at all normal . I am glad that you can write about the experience and say that you are doing ok at this point. There is something seriously wrong with that man- to insinuate that you should have had this done in a hospital, but not be willing to have done that IN THE FIRST PLACE- what is wrong with him??? This can be a cautionary tale to others- it is normal to have LIS under a general- I have not even seen many on here talk about having the "twilight sleep or sedation" like versed and the painkiller they often do for colonoscopies but absolutely a general anesthetic.
You my dear were very very brave and I hope you will not be emotionally scarred by this experience. Yelling at you to "straighten up"?!!! Listen- there's a certain Dr. in Canada that I'd like to see in stirrups with something stuck up his a___! You are not a wimp. You deserve a medal and you should write a letter to someone. Maybe that will help get some of your understandable emotion out. Really- I am outraged for you. Enjoy your pain meds, take your stool softeners and treat yourself to something wonderful. And write that letter to the board that governs this guy before he is able to abuse someone else again.
And I am so glad to go back and read your first sentence that you do feel better than before the surgery. Thank the Lord above for that!
Bambi

Btw, good on you for telling your story, you should post his name( not sure if that's a crime somehow) so ppl know NOT to get LIS from this doc, and go through what you endured. I bet you left that place feeling violated. I would've! Be proud you got through and please keep us updated.

Thank you all so much for the sympathy and support (I'm teary as I write this - I guess I'm still a bit emotionally delicate). I definitely felt violated and really traumatized. Thanks for making me feel better.

I really didn't think I was a wimp. I endured gallstones as a teenager (until I had my gallbladder removed at 18) - and gallstones hurt like crushing broken glass with you guts. This was also worse when I woke up from a hysterectomy and the dern morphine didn't work! (I had to wait hours for the morphine to leave my system before they could give me demerol). I'm not a stranger to pain. But the gallbladder and hyterectomy I could laugh about a day later. This one ... I don't know if I'll ever be able to laugh about it.

Right now I'm just telling myself that the fact that this guy is a sadist doesn't mean he's incompetent - so I'm hoping that I didn't get butchered. Anti-anxiety meds are a great idea. I'll call my GP tomorrow and ask for some.

I think you are all right to suggest reporting this guy - I don't want anybody else to go through what I went through. I'll be writing to the Ontario College of Physicians and Surgeons at the very least and posting a review on every 'ratemydoctor' site I can find. I think a suitable punishment for this doc is that he has to get his own ass surgery!

I will also take your advice and focus on the good news - the pain has diminished dramatically ... and no burning! I am very happy about that. I will love and nurture my new bum and focus on creating a happy ending.

I am so grateful to all of you. It is wonderful to have so much support and sympathy. I feel hugged

I'm so sorry for you, what you went through is insane! I would have beaten that freakin doctor to a pulp right there, ass bleeding or not. Be sure to report him everywhere you can.

But also, don't you have to go back to him for a post-op checkup? Maybe you shouldn't go and switch to another doctor if that's possible. I mean I don't know how you could even look at him in the future...

It's incredible how much bedside manner counts. I went for an examination yesterday to a CRS and while he was looking around he just touched the site or something so I groaned a bit. He immediately got up (I was on the same "up in the air" device), came around and patted me on the arm saying he was sorry. That almost made the pain go away!

Hope you are recovering after your awful experience. Do post the doctor's name. I had an experience where I stopped breathing under anesthetic, and I definitely gave all the info on the doctor. As long as you do not defame, but are honest so that others know what to expect, there is nothing wrong.

By the way, the CRS I saw in Boston, was Dr Rusin. Was not gentle...

hi all - I'm still doing ok! So far, not much pain ... but I'm still waiting for the day's BM, so we'll see how that goes. No burning or throbbing, which is great! Just a bit a stinging here and there. Things definitely feel looser down there. I can pass gas without it hurting (just a sting once) ... and nothing else has exited with the gas, so far (phew). Right now I'm mostly dealing with psychological issues - my faith in my surgeon was seriously undermined, so in my darker moments I worry that I will regret getting the surgery. Right now, I don't (I regret how it was done, but not that it was done). I'm just working on not worrying ... it's amazing how difficult that can be!

Dexterdude - you are right about the follow-up. I've been fretting about that. I plan to call my GP to ask him if he can send me to somebody else for a follow-up. If that's not an option, then I'll demand to see a different doctor at the clinic. And I will be bringing a copy of the patients' bill of rights with me, in case I have to stuff it up a doctor's a$$. You are so right about bedside manner. A little compassion really makes such a difference when you're in pain!

You all are also right that I should provide more information about my surgeon. I think I will post a new topic thread so that it will be easier for future sufferers to find on this forum when they are doing their research.

Wow, Em! you stopped breathing! yikes! I'm so glad you reported that! Elphie, I often wonder if Canada has a disproportionate amount of knuckle-head doctors. I don't want to be unfair, because I have met some very good ones; but I have met soooo many real nut-cases too. Can socialized medicine cause personality disorders in the medical community?

It is so wonderful to have a forum like this. All your kindness and encouragement made my ordeal much easier to deal with. I definitely didn't feel so alone! It's great to have this community.

I hope you are all having a very good butt day!

It is funny, if you can say that about socialised medicine as I lived for 15 years in Copenhagen, and I had the most wonderful doctor. He did everything for me, was consciouses (sp) about following things up, did my pap smears, did everything. And, if I was sick and needed a doctor to come to the house after hours, there was always one available. Spoilt!

Wow! To your house! That doctor sounds wonderful! I'm sure I've just had some bad luck with doctors and that there are many very good ones up here. I really value our medical system, but we do have real problems with wait-times and with personality problems among doctors. Some of that might be due to the fact that we have major doctor shortages and our doctors are under a lot of stress. We actually import quite a few doctors from South Africa - who, BTW, are wonderful. I know a few who were trained at Stellenbosch ... but I do feel bad about stealing doctors from other countries.

Please report that guy!

I'd like to give him a fissure, that's for sure!

Hopefully though this will eventually be a distant memory for you, life with a normal butt cannot be overvalued in my opinion.

I'll be thinking of ya!

Hopetoheal. I actually know a doctor from SA who is now in Canada! Stellenbosch is the most beautiful university town, surrounded by old wine farms. And mountains.

How it works at night in Denmark is that they have a system that roughly translates to 'doctor night watch' that if you are ill you call and get whichever doctor is on watch, and a taxi takes him/her to wherever the patient is. Quite nice, tis true, but you pay high taxes for the things that the state provides. I thought it fair, however. I think that people should have systems like that, but Denmark is a small country which is perhaps why it works.